Merry Christmas for an old fart

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A girls night out out allows peace to reign throughout the house; delighting in the space and silence he finds a bottle of Gin and a bottle of Bitter Lemon bought for a party and never opened.

Christmas lights twinkle on the tree in the bay window, reflecting in the glass and on the back of the shiny leather sofa; the TV is on but largely ignored, the battery of his laptop however is burning hot on the coffee table in the sitting room as the faint smell of pine circulates the room. Christmas eve is only 6 days away and he contemplates buying his first present having spent the best part of 3 hours mulling over Facebook updates and Google searches.

The ice in his glass is almost completely evaporated as he makes the commitment to buy vouchers yet again. His Family Christmas Cards remain unwritten and he decides that this year is the last of his humbug lack-a-dasical attitude. Next year he will plan early, buy real gifts and write meaningful cards that consider a worthwhile charity with an appropriate image.

He finds his Google calendar and drops helpful hints into various October and November dates for next year... Now he's vaguely tipsy and mumbles as he writes in another hint for next year "Merry Christmas, you old fart!"